After many long months of waiting, on the 29th of June our tour began with a 6am meet in the Gatwick Wetherspoons, 6 hours before our boarding time.

Getting to the pub was easier for some than others; Matt Yeabsley and Alex Morgan had to enlist the help of an airport policeman to negotiate the complexities and intricacies of stairs. With everyone looking flair in their rogue jackets and hats, the first beers of tour were nursed along with a bacon sandwich. Most beers were nursed, I say, but Freddie Turner started as he intended to carry on by voluntarily seeing of three Guinness’ on the head.

After a quick introduction to our tour Mascot Sulleman and of our new Canterbury tour gears – Goddard being fined heavily for ordering kit with a p*rple badge - we were advised to slow down so as to be allowed on to the plane and so, vision only slightly blurred, we set off for Barbados.

On arrival at Bridgetown, we dabbled in a little bit of celeb spotting, Rimmer James Rimmer befriending Tim Krul by simply asking him ‘Are you Tim Krul?’ and then taking a selfie with him.

Having got to the Coconut Court Hotel, it is fair to say that we may have lost our heads just a little. The hotel may have made a mistake in offering us free rum punch for an hour, turning out to be all we needed. The heady mix of rum, jet lag and a local reggae band made for an evening to remember, or perhaps not for our glorious leader Oli ‘the emperor’ Strong. Despite having been on a previous tour to Barbados, he managed to write himself off within two hours of arriving, leading him to being carried out of the hotel bar by 5 of the touring party.

The first night in the hotel was where we first heard what instantly became the tour song. ‘My Rum’ by Gorg is certainly worth a listen if you for some weird reason aren’t familiar with it.

The itinerary for Day 2 of the tour was a light training session on the beach. Unsurprisingly, this never materialised. Nursing some sore heads, we all headed down to the bar to do our two before 11 so as to avoid the dreaded 11 before two, which as both George Ellwood and Tom Pedel can testify, was unpleasant to say the least.

The day was spent relaxing in the Caribbean sunshine with sunburn secretary Scott Weddell always ready to dish out sun cream to the boys, while ironically forgetting to apply any to himself to be greeted with burn more colourful than his exceptional speedos.

After happy hour in the Blue Room bar, some of us headed to the nearby St Lawrence Gap. This proved to be a slightly anticlimactic first night out, even with Alex Morgan’s traumatic ride in a local cab reducing him to tears. Nevertheless we settled in to a bar and enjoyed a few Banks before returning to the hotel.

On Wednesday we travelled to Combermere School to play our first game on tour, Morgan picking himself up and captaining for the day.

As our tour guide Tom Pedel predicted the wicket looked like a road but had a bit of crumble to it, a speech repeated almost every game en route to the grounds. Morgan started well by losing the toss and surprisingly the hosts elected to bat. Andrew Turner bowled a beauty first up, however, James Hawkes, perhaps suffering from the night before, dollied it.

This proved to be our only chance to remove Boucher who played two games against us scoring 150 runs. They batted well to post 220 in 35 overs, and losing Morgan early to a quick in-swinging yorker was not the ideal start. Ellwood batted beautifully from then on hitting the same bowler for a big six over midwicket much to the surprise of the supporters club, with Tour Social Sec Ally Haines impressing the local 60 year olds with a punctual 4 on the head. Despite our best efforts we came up well short but had the evening to look forward to.

Wednesday evening was our first introduction to Harbour Lights and unlimited booze. What followed was a night that will never be forgotten - the less said the better, ending shortly after James Francis ensured best bud George Ellwood enjoyed the night by force feeding him rum punch until he passed out at the table.

Thursday was our second game at Empire Cricket Club, one of the strongest sides on the island. Despite pounding heads, the game began well with Scott Weddell and captain Robbie Goddard scoring freely. After a couple of quick wickets Goddard and Sam Goodwill rebuilt against a variety of spinners on a turning wicket. Goddard brought up his maiden EUMCC fifty and continued to muscle the ball around the ground reaching 61. However, both batsmen being dismissed led to a huge collapse with only Freddie Turner offering any resistance. We were bowled out for 160, well below par.

Tom Pedel then preceded to bowl the best spell seen on tour, bowling sharply nipping the ball around. Peds took 4 wickets which could have been more had our catching been up to scratch. James Rimmer the stand in keeper took several brilliant one handed catches despite refusing to move his feet.

Unfortunately the Barbados captain took the game away from us with a rapid seventy, particularly enjoying the bowling of James ‘best action in the club’ Francis, hitting him out of the ground several times! In the end Empire won fairly comfortably, however, we continued our winning streak in the stump challenge, a game which was very popular with the locals.

Friday was a relaxed day on the beach featuring some very competitive games of volleyball, before a welcome evening return to Harbour lights. After ‘sipping’ away at our fines on the beach, the night ended early for some after attempting to climb the dancefloor’s infrastructure, not one of Matt “least intelligent person on tour” Yeabsley’s better ideas.

Saturday was the highlight of the tour for many, spending the day on a Catamaran sailing along the coast. The combination of free alcohol, beautiful sunshine and the sea made it a euphoric few hours. We snorkelled with turtles, a truly amazing experience, dampened slightly by the inability to ‘ride the turtles’ as Goddard had promised.

During the day James Rimmer, Fresher of the Day, was refused alcohol and told to have a 15 minute cool down period. We stopped at a few beaches and enjoyed the traditional lunch of chicken and mac-pie laid on for us. We snorkelled in speedos (a little treat for the others on the boat) and enjoyed the plethora of coral and reef life in the crystal clear water before returning to shore much redder (apart from the olive skinned George Ellwood) and less hydrated than we had begun.

We left slightly earlier on Sunday morning in order to reach Massy Wildey CC, for the first time heading up into the hills. We thought the altitude might offer some respite from the oppressive heat experienced nearer Bridgetown but the lack of sea breeze made it even worse.

A particularly small pitch greeted us with a road running along one side of the pitch, off-spinner Sam Goodwill groaning as he envisaged bombs flying over cow corner off his bowling.

Oli Strong, captain for the day, managed to lose the toss and we found ourselves fielding. A hostile start from Andrew Turner at one end was complimented by the tight and miserly Matt Yeabsley at the other and with a couple of early wickets we seemed to have them on the rack.

Unfortunately their opener, future West Indies international (you heard it here first) Boucher, who we had had the misfortune of playing in our first game began to go after the bowling and we spent the rest of the innings looking for balls that sailed over our heads. Boucher made an impressive hundred and Massy Wildey an imposing but gettable 215 off their 35 overs.

Strong, using his dictatorial powers as captain and emperor, went into open alongside Alex Morgan, still searching for his first run of tour. He achieved that with a six off first ball and followed that up with some classy cover drives for one on the overgrown outfield.

Both openers departed and were followed shortly by Robbie Goddard and James Hawkes. Freddie Turner managed to run out Scott Weddell in his last EUMCC innings and then compiled a sprightly fifteen before falling to the left-arm spinner fast becoming our nemesis, leaving Charlie Leach and Goodwill at the crease. These two kept the scoreboard ticking until Goodwill unleashed an over of bombs against said left-arm spinner, putting the target within reach. Leach fell to an ugly mow before “Jerome”, their left-arm quick, took centre stage, clearly held back for this occasion.

Turner and Yeabsley kept us going with some boundaries but it was never going to be enough and we finished 30 runs short, Goodwill stranded on 77. Post-match warm-down included the now-customary stump challenge. We won convincingly, taking our win tally in the competition that mattered to three from three.

That evening we set about doing our heaviest fines session yet with Leach and Strong hitting double figures for various misdemeanours over the weekend.

Fortunately for some, on reaching St Lawrence Gap, where we were going to consume these fines, we realised that Sunday night in Barbados isn’t quite as lively as hoped, like many places in the world outside Exeter and we retired home (via KFC) for an early one.

On Monday morning we set off in a similar direction to reach Isolation Cavaliers CC, located (as the name suggests) in the middle of nowhere. After introductions to both the team and pictures involving some well-known Bajan cricketing families, we set out to bat in spectacular surroundings, James Francis having upset the trend by winning a toss. George Ellwood opened up with Morgan, who started quickly by ramping their opening bowler for four off his first ball.

Ellwood went first, followed by Morgan, leaving Ally Hanies and Goodwill at the crease. Hanies dispatched our only bomb of the innings (the boundary being the largest we would encounter) and Goodwill picked up where he left off from the previous game. Hanies went, soon followed by Freddie Turner and Leach joined Goodwill at the crease.

Stifled by the lack of pace on the ball the pair could only knock the ball around before both went in quick succession when trying to accelerate. An Australian-esque collapse ensued despite Archie Hood’s best efforts to keep the sinking ship afloat and we stumbled to a below-par 160.

This was always going to be difficult to defend, but Tom Pedel’s elbow gave in in our first over and from then on they were always going to win. Francis, Fraser Moon, James Ince and Goodwill kept it fairly tight, but our lack of bowlers told and, despite a late flurry of wickets, they reached 160 only four down with twelve overs to go.

Chastened but not totally dispirited by our fourth consecutive loss, we returned to Coconut Court in time for Rum Happy Hour (it being a Monday) and consoled ourselves in a marginally more dignified manner than the previous week. We had what was probably the longest rendition of “My Rum” in history before some proceeded to St Lawrence Gap, others to Bridgetown “on a rogue one”, and all made it back more or less in one piece.

Tuesday morning started with Coconut Court from the previous evening. Hanies was miraculously adjudged not guilty of the heinous charge of trying to put his mates in prison, alleged to have occurred the previous night during said “rogue one”.

Several of the group decided to go and play Barbados Golf Club in the afternoon. Goodwill had been talking a good game all week and disappointingly, according to the rest of his group, he lived up to it. We finished in pitch darkness due to our twilight hour tee off times which made for a particularly odd scene on the eighteenth green where Francis, Morgan and Leach were putting out for bragging rights despite having no idea where the hole was.

Two before eleven was still in action for the whole team on Wednesday morning, the day of our final game, a T20 under lights. Freddie Turner made the early morning pilgrimage to The Lucky Horseshoe to watch the first morning of the first Ashes Test and the rest joined in dribs and drabs to witness a decent first day.

We made our way to the ground in the evening after spending the rest of the day by the pool soaking up some last rays. Fines were aplenty before the game had even started, the outfield bearing cracks that caused no end of fumbles to James Rimmer and co in fielding practice.

Rimmer lost the toss and we went out to field, Andrew Turner and Yeabsley once more opening up and combining well to remove their first two batsman. The third was in fact a girl, who her father delighted in telling the supporters’ club had just been on tour to Sri Lanka with the West Indies women’s team. She played well until Andrew Turner ran her out with a skilful/ungentlemanly direct hit. We proceeded to take wickets at regular intervals, restricting them to 112, an eminently gettable target.

Morgan once again started well and got a quick 36, ably assisted by Ellwood, Goddard and Hanies. Goodwill and Rimmer nudged us closer to our maiden victory of tour and, despite losing regular wickets, we managed to get over the line with three wickets in hand. Jubilant celebrations and a quick supper were followed by our final trip to Harbour Lights where we finished off what was left of the island’s rum.

Everyone woke bleary-eyed the next day. A couple of hours were spent by the pool before we said our goodbyes and boarded our transfer to the airport. We took some final photos and jumped on the flight, landing eight hours later back at Gatwick, sad that an unforgettable tour had come to an end.

Without a lift home, it’s no surprise that Hanies swiftly returned to his rightful spot in Wetherspoons. We had enjoyed a fantastic couple of weeks doing whatever we could find that this magical island had to offer, all in the spirit that makes EUMCC the club it is.